A friend asked me how I know that the message from the death of Chananya Backer is that the community needs to do more to reach out to kids who feel disconnected.
I don't know. But I do know this. A tragic death of a child whose funeral is attended by over 1,000 on Tisha B'Av, is clearly a message from G-d that he wants something from us. So even if I am missing the mark as to what that something is, my challenge to you is "What are you going to do about it?"
It is easy to walk away from such an event feeling moved an inspired to do something and then never do anything. You don't know what to do, you don't have the time to do. So we walk away and before we know it, it is all forgotten.
That is what we cannot do.
I believe, that especially on Tisha B'Av, the day more than any other on which we are meant to work on our interpersonal love, and learn to show unconditional love to others, that that must be an element of the message.
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Every person is at the center of his/her own "ripple effect". And the ripple is only created in one direction. From the center outward. So IT ALL BEGINS WITH ME.
It behooves me as a frum, mitzvah abiding member of the community to examine what it is I am and what it is that I am not doing? What have I/we gotten so wrapped up in, that something else that is so important is neglected?
One of those things, I believe, is the concept of being a MENTSCH. And MENTSCH is not typically related to any level of keeping Shabbos, Kosher or Taharas HaMitshpacha (the mitzvohs that traditionally would make one be considered frum). MENTSCH is respect; addressing older people as Mr. or Mrs., not interrupting others' conversations, being quiet in public places such as the library. Make being "just plain nice and pleasant" a beautiful thing! Simple! Basic! And it leads to other values and concepts as the child grows up. The differentiation between the traditional laws of Tznius and the problems with promiscuous behavior! It leads to the differentiation between driving on Shabbos and driving under the influence of drugs or alcohol! It tells the child and later the young adult that even when they are not keeping some (or many) Mitzvohs, MENTSCH and being a law abiding citizen is another valuable goal. And accomplishing that status is honorable as well.
Perhaps if we can instill those values in our children BY EXAMPLE and by truly believing that (Kids see right through "lip service")we will merit to see Nachas from ourselves, all the members of our families and community and the entire nation (that ripple effect again)! AMEN
(and I apologize again for having to remain anonymous for fear of retaliation/ a beautiful concept in our "world", is it not?)
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